three wise men fireman
Driving through a small Southern town I saw a "Nativity Scene"
that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it.
One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing
firemen's helmets.
Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I
decided to stop at a "Quick Stop" on the edge of town.
I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets.
She responded in annoyance, "You Yankees never do read the
Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply did not recall anything
about firemen in the Bible.
She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled
through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a
passage. Sticking it in my face she said "See, it says right
here, 'The three wise man came from afar.'"
***
The shoe dealer was interviewing a potential salesman.
"Suppose," he said, "a lady customer were to remark while
you were trying to fit her, 'Don't you think one of my
feet is bigger than the other?' What would you say?"
"I would say, 'On the contrary, Ma'am, one is smaller
than the other.'"
"The job is yours."
***
"Children need encouragement. So if a kid gets an answer right,
tell him it was a lucky guess. That way, he develops a good,
lucky feeling." --Jack Handey
***
"'I have done that,' says my memory. 'I cannot have done
that' - says my pride, and remains adamant. At last - memory
yields." --Friedrich Nietzsche
***
After 50 years of wondering why he didn't look like his
younger sister or brother, the man finally got up the nerve
to ask his mother if he was adopted.
"Yes, you were son," his mother said as she started to cry
softly. "but it didn't work out and they brought you back."
***
There's an old saying that if it weren't for the last minute
nothing would get done. Well, thank goodness for that last
minute! On January 30th Mason finally found a New Year's Eve
party that wasn't sold out. They saw us coming, though. The
tickets were a hundred dollars per person.
But what are you going to do? I'm still too young and good-
looking to sit home on New Year's Eve with the X-Box and a
case of beer. Well...too young anyway.
I have no idea if I had a good time yet. I'll fill you in on
any good stores next week.
Make sure you write 2004 on your checks.
To SUBSCRIBE: clean l affs
http://www.gophercentral.com/sub/sub-jokes.html
that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it.
One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing
firemen's helmets.
Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I
decided to stop at a "Quick Stop" on the edge of town.
I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets.
She responded in annoyance, "You Yankees never do read the
Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply did not recall anything
about firemen in the Bible.
She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled
through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a
passage. Sticking it in my face she said "See, it says right
here, 'The three wise man came from afar.'"
***
The shoe dealer was interviewing a potential salesman.
"Suppose," he said, "a lady customer were to remark while
you were trying to fit her, 'Don't you think one of my
feet is bigger than the other?' What would you say?"
"I would say, 'On the contrary, Ma'am, one is smaller
than the other.'"
"The job is yours."
***
"Children need encouragement. So if a kid gets an answer right,
tell him it was a lucky guess. That way, he develops a good,
lucky feeling." --Jack Handey
***
"'I have done that,' says my memory. 'I cannot have done
that' - says my pride, and remains adamant. At last - memory
yields." --Friedrich Nietzsche
***
After 50 years of wondering why he didn't look like his
younger sister or brother, the man finally got up the nerve
to ask his mother if he was adopted.
"Yes, you were son," his mother said as she started to cry
softly. "but it didn't work out and they brought you back."
***
There's an old saying that if it weren't for the last minute
nothing would get done. Well, thank goodness for that last
minute! On January 30th Mason finally found a New Year's Eve
party that wasn't sold out. They saw us coming, though. The
tickets were a hundred dollars per person.
But what are you going to do? I'm still too young and good-
looking to sit home on New Year's Eve with the X-Box and a
case of beer. Well...too young anyway.
I have no idea if I had a good time yet. I'll fill you in on
any good stores next week.
Make sure you write 2004 on your checks.
To SUBSCRIBE: clean l affs
http://www.gophercentral.com/sub/sub-jokes.html
